Fake news and commentary, published from Scotland
Popular walking routes, The Three Lochs Way and The John Muir Way could soon be joined by a new route for tourists to tackle. Although perhaps not as scenic as the others, the shorter “Three Gridlocks Way” will allow keen walkers to take in three different gridlocks in Helensburgh. Walkers tackling the route can start […]
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With Helensburgh evidently being the town where streets have no name, the ‘Adviser reached out to representatives for Irish rock band U2 for comment on the obvious parallels between the town and their song “Where the streets have no name.” Although Bono and Edge were unavailable, a spokesperson for the band commented that Helensburgh’s faded […]
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A recent post on the Facebook group Angry, Opinionated People of Helensburgh noting the filthy state of pavements has seemingly betrayed everything locals thought they knew to be true regarding how they have been kept clean in the past. A few misguided residents were certain they could remember a time when Argyll and Bute Council […]
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A cowardly delinquent defaced the cenotaph wall at Hermitage Park in a poorly executed defamation attempt just days before Remembrance Sunday.
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Overzealous nocturnal tree felling continues apace despite protests from sleepless residents.
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The recently rejuvenated park is under consideration as the site of a new venture with the potential to generate thousands in “delinquent tourism” money.
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The source of the thick fog that blanketed Helensburgh during the Christmas holidays has been linked to Riverhill Courtyard Restaurant & Bar kitchen exhaust. Conditions that impacted visibility in Helensburgh’s town centre and surrounding area for several days was merely thought to be due to seasonal weather. However, the ‘Adviser has discovered that the festive […]
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Public opinion suggests that the crudely animated robin in the north-west corner of the square with the disappearing beak and legs might just be the most pointless decoration ever.
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Although a final decision on the fate of the site’s challenging parking meters has yet to be made, the ‘Adviser has learned that the machines could feature in a popular entrapment game.
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The town centre gift shop has made the unexpected move of joining in the mass consumer frenzy by “slashing prices” for the event known as Black Friday.
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